Contagion vs Isolation: On Finding Love in a Post-Pandemic, War-Riddled World
Since the beginning of the 2020’s, the world has experienced a global pandemic as well as deadly wars. As these words are being written, many are going through extreme pain, deprivation, fear, and despair. It is becoming increasingly hard to digest how much aggression our (human) race is capable of, and how vulnerable and fragile we really are. Even those of us privileged to avoid acute loss are still dealing with constant stress, existential suffering, and spiritual trauma. Being exposed to ongoing news of terror, violence, illness, injury, and death, our bodyminds incessantly absorb the destruction around us.
It seems to me that our defense mechanism, as a society, has been to avoid physical, ideological, and emotional contagion. Some of us have never returned to a physical office since Covid broke out. Some only communicate with politically like-minded people and shun those who feel differently. We have little tolerance for perspectives that challenge our convictions, and we are willing to ignore anything that does not fit with our worldview. Some of us feel hated and persecuted and seek solace in those deemed to be similar to us, or avoid leaving the protective isolation of our homes.
We split into good/bad, right/wrong, healthy/sick, valuable/disposable, dangerous/safe, and hope to be on the “right” side of the split. While this may create a temporary illusion of safety, often this self-isolation leads to disconnection, increased anxiety, depressed states, and a sense of meaninglessness. And here we touch on the paradoxical nature of contagion. By quarantining, either physically or psychologically, we create a bubble for ourselves. Sometimes, this is indeed necessary; borders and boundaries are a prerequisite of survival. However, without ever risking any contagion at all, how could we build immunity, grow, connect, love, trust, create, or laugh?
This is a complicated time to consider our personal comfort level with contagion, however, I believe this task is necessary. As for me, personally, I value in-person encounters, trusting that those I come in contact with would warn me if they were sick. I try to be fully present in my personal and professional life. I follow the news and allow myself to feel deep confusion and worry. I say secular prayers. I take small actions to make things better, in my own way. I try to really listen, even when the words and voices of those uttering them cause turmoil and pain. I take responsibility for the pain I cause, when I find the strength to do so. I accept that sometimes I can be wrong, and perhaps even ignorant. I honor the right for secure existence. I hurt when it is violated. I believe that conflicts must be faced and resolved. I (naively?) hope for peace, even if I know that at this moment it is extremely far away.